I actually swore off the notion of finding "one true love" at the tender age of 13. There's no one person out there who is everything I want in a relationship, and wasting my life looking for this imaginary guy is just going to leave me bitter and alone. Oddly enough though, I do believe in soulmates, if only because there have been several times in my life where I've met someone, and they became close, trusted friends practically overnight.
And because of these people, I think I could be contentedly alone so long as I have the friendship and support of close friends who love me. I don't need to be wined, dined, flowered, and gifted. I've gotten more emotional satisfaction from a hug with a friend than I have from a passionate kiss with a guy I thought I loved.
The article you linked does bother me on some levels, and I think aside from the "Every woman wants a baby/family" sentiment, a lot of it stems from the negativity associated with "settling" for anything less than the "One True Love." Despite the writer's claims to the contrary, it seems that she's finally gotten bitter or desperate enough that she's trying to talk herself into accepting the notion. I've always believed that if ever settle down with anyone, it would be a "Best friend love" situation, because that's what I really want out of a guy--someone who I can trust, and whose company I enjoy. Sure, there's compatibility issues as well, but I'm willing to compromise on most things, and there's also always the "agree to disagree" way of settling things.
Hollywood continues to provide excellent examples of what happens when people look for Soulmates; most celebrity relationships flare up and fizzle out like firecrackers, and the well-tended hearthfires of long-term, happy relationships are a teeny tiny exception. Perhaps it's because they live so often in the fantasy stories they help to create that they've completely absorbed the "one true love" mentality.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2008-03-05 04:33 pm (UTC)And because of these people, I think I could be contentedly alone so long as I have the friendship and support of close friends who love me. I don't need to be wined, dined, flowered, and gifted. I've gotten more emotional satisfaction from a hug with a friend than I have from a passionate kiss with a guy I thought I loved.
The article you linked does bother me on some levels, and I think aside from the "Every woman wants a baby/family" sentiment, a lot of it stems from the negativity associated with "settling" for anything less than the "One True Love." Despite the writer's claims to the contrary, it seems that she's finally gotten bitter or desperate enough that she's trying to talk herself into accepting the notion. I've always believed that if ever settle down with anyone, it would be a "Best friend love" situation, because that's what I really want out of a guy--someone who I can trust, and whose company I enjoy. Sure, there's compatibility issues as well, but I'm willing to compromise on most things, and there's also always the "agree to disagree" way of settling things.
Hollywood continues to provide excellent examples of what happens when people look for Soulmates; most celebrity relationships flare up and fizzle out like firecrackers, and the well-tended hearthfires of long-term, happy relationships are a teeny tiny exception. Perhaps it's because they live so often in the fantasy stories they help to create that they've completely absorbed the "one true love" mentality.